A groom’s speech is one of the most anticipated at a wedding. After all, you’ve just married the woman of your dreams (hopefully!) and it is the moment the guests to find out your inner-most thoughts.
It doesn’t have to be all about getting emotional with gushing praise of your newly acquired wife, an over the top special tribute to her father for giving his permission for the ceremony to happen in the first place, or a frankly boring and endless list of thanks to all of those who helped in the build up to the special day.
Yes, it is the best man’s speech which traditionally follows that will be filled with jokes, humour and some good old fashioned banter. But the groom’s speech structure should also contain some jokes too.
Get the balance right and you’ll have a stormer of a speech with a perfect blend of reflection and humour. But remember, don’t aim too many of the jokes at your best man – he’s coming up next after all and can get his own back. And more importantly, don’t make them too crude or abusive towards the new mother-in-law. Rule that out straight away. You don’t want to get off to the worst possible start to married life do you?
So, with all that in mind, what sort of jokes are right for a groom to include? Certainly nothing that insults family, friends or assembled guests. But a pleasant bit of mickey taking, a few funny anecdotes and some personal gentle ribbing do work well and ensure the groom’s speech goes down a storm.
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“I’ve been told to keep it short and keep it clean, so I’ve had it dangled in a pint of icy water for the last 15 minutes”
“The last time I addressed a room full of people like this I was in court.”
“Let me tell you that is not the first time today I have risen from a warm seat with a bit of paper in my hand.”
“I’d like to thank Mastercard and Visa, without whom this would never have been possible. My wife and I will be forever in their debt.”
“Without all of you here today, it wouldn’t be the same…but it would be cheaper.”
While it is important you remember the first thing to do is say how beautiful your bride looks, you can also use a bit of humour to show how much you love your new wife. Poke fun at yourself too about being under the thumb or having had no say in what the wedding day was going to be like. It will be well received by guests and your new missus too.
“I’ve got a very funny speech prepared for you, but my wife has told to me read this one instead.”
“My ex-girlfriend and I would like to thank you all for coming today.”
“My Wife Says I Never Listen, Or Something Like That.”
“I’ve married Miss Right. I just didn’t know her first name was Always.”
FATHER-IN-LAW / MOTHER-IN-LAW
You don’t want to upset the in-laws, but let’s face it, they’ll be expecting a bit of ribbing while you have the chance. So take it, but don’t get personal.
“My father-in-law told me it would be the happiest day of my life. He was right, the stag do was unforgettable.”
“Someone told me this will be the only time I’m in a room with my mother-in-law where I’ll be able to speak without getting interrupted.”
THE BEST MAN / STAG DO
Tell a couple of jokes about your relationship with the best man, or about what went on at the stag do – without getting to into the shenanigans of a drink-fuelled weekend. Take the mickey of your mates.
Or use some jokes at their expense:
“I’d like to say the bridesmaids look like one in a million today. The best man and grooms, on the other hand, look like they were won in a raffle.”
USE PICTURES, VIDEO OR PROPS
Jokes don’t have to be just about one-liners and gags. Use videos, audio clips or props to add a little humour into your speech. It will help get the guests involved and add to the funniness of the day. Audio jokes have been used speeches, props and images of the happy couple and even raps and songs have been used to perform the speech.
There are an awful lot of ways to make your speech memorable and personal to you and your new wife and if you’re still intrigued see more groom’s speech examples for inspiration.