{"id":2882,"date":"2011-07-05T08:08:58","date_gmt":"2011-07-05T13:08:58","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.topweddingsites.com\/wedding-blog\/?p=2882"},"modified":"2011-07-05T08:08:58","modified_gmt":"2011-07-05T13:08:58","slug":"wedding-planning-causing-conflict-consider-it-an-opportunity-to-grow-closer","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.topweddingsites.com\/wedding-blog\/wedding-planning\/wedding-planning-causing-conflict-consider-it-an-opportunity-to-grow-closer","title":{"rendered":"Wedding Planning Causing Conflict? Consider It An Opportunity To Grow Closer"},"content":{"rendered":"

Are you arguing during the wedding planning process? Conflict in relationships is something 78 percent of couples try to avoid.\u00a0 However, in a national survey of fifty thousand couples, the most significant factor which made the difference between happy couples and unhappy couples was whether or not they both felt understood when working through a conflict.\u00a0 Couples who are happy in their relationships are ones that resolve their conflicts.<\/p>\n

Obstacles To Resolving Conflict<\/strong><\/p>\n

One myth that stands in the way of using conflict to grow closer is the expectation that conflict should not exist in a relationship and something is wrong if it does exist. \u00a0Conflict is actually an inevitable aspect of relationships.\u00a0 Love is still present in the relationship.<\/p>\n

\"\"

Another obstacle to resolving conflict is denial.\u00a0 Research has shown that 78 percent of couples go out of their way to avoid conflict.\u00a0 This only makes things worse.\u00a0 Conflict exists for a reason; it carries a message or a lesson for us.\u00a0 The sooner we address it, the sooner we grow as individuals and as a couple.\u00a0 The longer we avoid it, the more the issue festers and grows.<\/p>\n

Another issue that stands in the way of resolving conflict is attacking the person rather than the problem.\u00a0 We also tend to let old problems go unresolved.\u00a0 They will keep returning and lead to more anger and pain.\u00a0 Handling anger improperly is another big factor that can interfere with the healthy growth of a relationship.\u00a0 One way we mishandle it is by suppressing it, which leads to bitterness and resentment.\u00a0 Holding it in can also lead to personal anxiety, depression, and other illnesses.\u00a0 Suppressed anger can make a person cynical and passive-aggressive, resulting in unhappy relationships.<\/p>\n

<\/strong><\/p>\n

Resolving Conflict <\/strong><\/p>\n

Resolving conflict is one of the most important keys to a happy relationship.\u00a0 If couples can master the art and science of conflict resolution, they multiply the chances of a successful marriage.\u00a0 One step in the direction of doing this successfully is to actually welcome conflict when it occurs.\u00a0 Conflict is an opportunity to grow closer to your partner.\u00a0 If you use it that way, it is easier to embrace it when it occurs.\u00a0 Conflict isn\u2019t a competition, and surprisingly it also isn\u2019t a problem to be solved.\u00a0 It is an opportunity to learn and grow.\u00a0 When your partner is angry or upset, you have stirred feelings and it is a sign this person truly cares about you and the issue.\u00a0 Understanding these feelings will help you connect at a deeper level.\u00a0 Don\u2019t concentrate on being right or wrong; rather seek to connect by listening carefully to what is upsetting your partner and how they feel.\u00a0 Reflect that back to them so they can say with confidence that you understand.\u00a0 Once they feel understood they will stop being defensive and will open their heart.\u00a0 Have the strength yourself to be vulnerable and face your own fear.\u00a0 This will lead to greater intimacy.<\/p>\n

Tools For Resolution<\/strong><\/p>\n