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Once upon a time in Holland, a beautiful young Dutch girl fell in love with a penniless baker \u2014 a man below her station, her father said. The humorless man ordered her to give up her love and marry another suitor, a man with many pigs. When she refused, her father likewise refused to provide her with a dowry.<\/p>\n<p>In those days, that was a deal breaker \u2014 the wedding couldn\u2019t go on. But sympathetic townspeople rallied around the would-be couple, and one by one proffered up the bits and pieces that made a household possible: plates, cookware, fabric, candles. By the time they were finished, the couple had more than enough to marry on. And ever since, the bridal shower has been a smash hit in all societal classes and all over the world. In other words, the refined and domesticated shower started as a way to rebel against your parents. Who knew?<\/p>\n<h2>Fast-Forward to Now<\/h2>\n<p>These days, of course, it\u2019s the rare couple who can afford to put on a wedding but can\u2019t afford to buy their own plates, and most men and women marry who they please. Still, the bridal shower carries on. There\u2019s just something about celebrating your impending nuptials with a gaggle of female friends that, for many people, adds up to one of the more memorable pre-wedding events.<\/p>\n<p>If you\u2019re the maid of honor, a close relative or one of the bridesmaids, perhaps the responsibility for planning this party has fallen to you. If you\u2019ve never done one before, you\u2019re probably wondering where to start. Most people began with these kinds of questions:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Who\u2019s throwing the bridal shower, and are the responsibilities shared?<\/li>\n<li>When is the shower?<\/li>\n<li>Who will we invite?<\/li>\n<li>Are we using a theme?<\/li>\n<li>What kinds of foods are we serving, and is it potluck, catered or somewhere in between?<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>Answers to these questions depend on the situation, but here are some traditional ways of doing things, and some suggestions for breaking tradition in pursuit of a better shower.<\/p>\n<h2>Who\u2019s On First?<\/h2>\n<p>The first detail to nail down is who\u2019s going to throw the bridal shower. Traditionally, the maid of honor throws the party, sometimes with the help of other bridesmaids. In recent years, though, it\u2019s become more common for others to get involved in the process. It\u2019s also becoming more and more popular to have more than one wedding shower. After all, many of us have various circles of friends who rarely meet or interact \u2014 our office friends, our workout friends, our hometown friends. So it\u2019s fairly typical now for a colleague to throw a party for the bride at \u201cthe firm,\u201d while the maid of honor throws a party for the bride and her hometown and college friends.<\/p>\n<p>The timing of the shower is also important. Traditionally, the shower takes place close to the wedding date, but not so close that it starts to hone in on the bride\u2019s last-minute preparations. A month before the wedding is probably about perfect, whereas anything closer than two weeks out is too close for comfort. You don\u2019t want to throw a shower too soon after the engagement, though. Bridal showers mean gifts, but a newly-engaged couple probably hasn\u2019t had a chance to put up their registry.<\/p>\n<p>Not you\u2019ve gotten that out of the way, who\u2019s going to attend? Bridal showers by nature are meant to be small and personal, so don\u2019t succumb to the temptation to invite every female on the guest list out of politeness. On the other hand, you\u2019ll want to be sure that her relatives and closest friends receive the summons. Is there more than one shower in the offing? This raises the complexity level, so make a point of getting together with the other host to coordinate your guest lists. Talk to the bride directly to make sure you\u2019ve invited the right people, or if your shower\u2019s a surprise, have a chat with her mom. Whatever you do, take care not to invite anyone to the shower who\u2019s lacking an invite to the wedding!<\/p>\n<h2>Dreaming Up a Theme<\/h2>\n<p>Now for the question of theme. Planning any party around a theme tends to make the going easier, and the results more memorable. If you\u2019re going to have one of those intimate gatherings in someone\u2019s home, a theme comes highly recommended. But that doesn\u2019t mean you have to use a tired or worn-out one \u2014 you can put your own spin on tradition.<\/p>\n<p>One way couples are reinventing the shower is by holding co-ed, \u201ccouples\u201d showers. This way, the groom and his friends can get in on the prenuptial fun \u2014 and possibly grill up some tasty treats for the partygoers.<\/p>\n<p>A more traditional way to weave in a theme is to borrow the one the bride\u2019s chosen for the wedding, or simply pick one that reflects her own tastes. A beach theme, for example, is perfect for the surf bunny bride. A \u201cLaw &amp; Order\u201d theme is sure to thrill the rising associate \u2014 be sure to \u201cdepose\u201d each guest for their funniest or most touching memories of the bride. Lovers of the grape would probably adore a wine tasting shower. Feeling adventurous? Throw a Mad Hatter tea party, or even a poker party for the <a href=\"https:\/\/www.favorideas.com\/wedding-themes\/unique-themes\/las-vegas-theme-wedding\/\">Vegas-loving bride<\/a>.<\/p>\n<p>But use the bride as your guide for themes <i>not<\/i> to venture into, as well. If she\u2019s a bit modest or conservative, or Great Aunt Hulda will be coming, a lingerie party (or God forbid, a \u201chookers\u201d theme) probably isn\u2019t such a swell idea.<\/p>\n<h2>A Party With (Her) Personality<\/h2>\n<p>By default, the food at a bridal shower typically consists of the kind of hors d\u2019oeuvres you can balance on a small plate while perched on the edge of a couch. But you don\u2019t have to stick to the old ways. You can serve whatever kind of food tickles your fancy, ranging from an elaborate sit-down dinner to a backyard pig roast. It\u2019s also not uncommon to just pick a local restaurant and leave the food to the professionals. When going this route, you don\u2019t have to cover the cost yourself \u2014 just let your guests know you\u2019re going dutch (here we are, back in Holland) in the invite.<\/p>\n<p>Then again, there are some women \u2014 and you know who you are, Angelina \u2014 for whom the domestic little party around the coffee table won\u2019t do at all. In that case, get out of the house. Be a day tripper and window shop at Tiffany\u2019s. Be loud and goofy tourists in your own town, and take the double-decker bus. Or join a growing trend and hang out at the spa.<\/p>\n<p>If the weather\u2019s mild, you could even get together at the nearest theme park and go on the craziest, loopiest, most backward-and-forward roller coaster ride you can find. Some parks offer bungee jumping \u2014 that\u2019s an activity you\u2019re sure to remember. Or if you\u2019re closer to the countryside, rustle up an hour\u2019s worth of horseback riding, followed by a relaxed cool-down period at the local pizza parlor. Remember those Girl Scout days and how fun they were? Why not gather your group at the nearest skating rink?<\/p>\n<p>So, if it\u2019s up to you to throw the shower, don\u2019t despair. You have plenty of guidelines to follow when you want, and plenty to toss out the window when it suits you. You can play board games in the parlor, or touch football at the park. Just keep the bride\u2019s personality in mind, and you\u2019re sure to serve up a big success.<\/p>\n<\/section>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Amid all the hustle and bustle of wedding planning, there\u2019s the hustle and bustle of pre-wedding parties. And one of the biggies is the bridal shower. As legend has it, the bridal shower started long ago and far away. Once upon a time in Holland, a beautiful young Dutch girl fell in love with a penniless baker \u2014 a man below her station, her father said. The humorless man ordered her to give up her love and marry another suitor, [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":91,"featured_media":45269,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[5572,89,3004,5764,4764],"class_list":["post-45255","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-ask-the-expert","tag-bridal-shower","tag-bridal-shower-favor-ideas","tag-fun-bridal-shower-themes","tag-shower"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v26.9 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Planning a Bridal Shower: Making and Breaking Tradition | | TopWeddingSites.com<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.topweddingsites.com\/wedding-blog\/uncategorized\/planning-bridal-shower-making-breaking-tradition\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Planning a Bridal Shower: Making and Breaking Tradition | | TopWeddingSites.com\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Amid all the hustle and bustle of wedding planning, there\u2019s the hustle and bustle of pre-wedding parties. And one of the biggies is the bridal shower. As legend has it, the bridal shower started long ago and far away. Once upon a time in Holland, a beautiful young Dutch girl fell in love with a penniless baker \u2014 a man below her station, her father said. 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