Hello — please help — at the current count my fiancé has 7 groomsmen and I only want 2-3 bridesmaids. Do we need to pad up the bridesmaids list to better match the number of groomsmen? How much difference can there be without the wedding party looking unbalanced? Thank you for your time!
Donna, Wedding Queen
Hello mjm –
The number of attendants selected is traditionally based on the formality of the wedding and number of guests invited. Only the most formal of weddings need that many groomsmen so your fiance may want to reconsider (unless he’s already asked them).
But, that’s not what you asked, is it? 😉
The attendants on each side don’t have to match, but it’s usually best to keep the numbers similar. So, if there were 5 bridesmaids and 7 groomsmen, that could appear well (or vice versa). But if there are no other women you’re close with, don;t just invite a random woman to be in the party to even up the sides since asking to be a member of the wedding party is not only an honor, but a pretty big commitment. Only ask those closest to the couple.
To provide additional information: 2 bridesmaids would be close friends of mine; the rest would be close friends of the groom (although I do know them and consider them friendly acquaintances). Would it still be inappropriate to ask them? Thank you again, I appreciate it!
Donna, Wedding Queen
My opinion is that that is a personal decision that should be considered by both of you, but usually the bridesmaids are close friends of the bride since they are going to be doing many personal things together, including trying on dresses. I guess you’d have to consider each woman separately and decide if each woman would appreciate being asked.
I’m sorry I can’t give you a more definitive answer. Sometimes these things are just personal decisions to be made and we can only offer what “most” do. 🙂
Owner/Senior Wedding Planner All Events Planned
I absolutely agree with the previous answers. Your bridal party should be filled with people that are close to you, since they are taking on important roles in your wedding. The only time that the bridal party is really going to stand out as being uneven, is in photos. If that’s the only worry, you can have your photographer try to do different line ups and be more creative with wedding party shots, so that the uneven amount doesn’t stand out.
While I love things to be even, I wouldn’t just pick random people to “fill in” empty spots. Good luck!!
Rebecca Black, Etiquette By Rebecca
I agree as well. Good luck with this!
I agree with all that has been said and I would not just ask random people to fill in. Let your photographer play with the uneven numbers and make it unusual…that’s what you are paying him for. He can creatively mix the photos to highlight your friends. When doing the recessional, I would pair up two groomsmen with one bridesmaid to make it work out.
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