Choosing A Unique First Dance Song

I had the opportunity to replace an unreliable DJ for a young couple’s wedding last September. They had booked their DJ almost a year in advance including paying his deposit. With five weeks to go before the big day, he had not sent a copy of his insurance certificate that was required for the venue yet. They tried to contact him several times and he hemmed and hawed without offering much more than evasive, sketchy answers. They finally decided they needed a different DJ and were willing to eat the deposit as part of their commitment to having an amazing wedding.

DJ Mystical Michael enters, stage left.

I liked them from first phone conversation. They were both actively involved in our emails trying to clear up the situation they had with less than five weeks left. We met in-person the first time before a public event I was DJing in Brooklyn. Since it was August, we sat outside and worked-out the specifics of their reception as the sun was fading. We had a lot of fun as I usually do when participating in the planning process of a wedding with the couple.

When we got to The First Dance Song, The Groom asked me if I knew the song, “Can’t Take My Eyes Off Of You”?

With surprise I asked, “You mean by Frankie Valli?”

“Yes!”

My surprise was two-fold. The first being the fact they are a very alternative couple with creative ways of doing everything and this seemed a bit too well, ‘normal’ for them. The other was that some of my family hung-out with Frankie and the other members of original The Four Lovers who later became The Four Seasons before they were famous. I have always had a positive feeling about him and them due to this fact.

“I definitely do. In fact…” I started to share with them the specifics of my family connections with Frankie and the band before he cut me off politely, “Not that version. Have you ever heard the version by Muse?”

“Uuuh, no.”

“Well we love the original but just recently heard this other version that starts real slow and builds up to a full-on rock song then returns to slow before cranking it back up again.”

The Bride jumped into with excitement in her voice, “We are the kind of couple that love both slow and fast songs and thought about having two First Dances so we could do one of each but this is perfect for us! Even though you do not know the song, would you be willing to play it for our First Dance for us?”

“Of course I will. It is your wedding and your First Dance. If you want it I will buy it for you. I am here for you and your guests. I told that to you on the phone and I mean it. If you want Muse as your First Dance, then Muse it is.”  Big smiles all around.

It turned out perfect as she said since they had choreographed their First Dance even with him not being the dancer type but he loved her and wanted this moment to be theirs to share with all their family and friends. It was slow and fast and slow and fast and it was completely and entirely them.

They followed their gut instincts about what to do and not follow what they thought others might expect from them and it worked. Everyone was cheering and grooving while standing and applauding throughout. He even did a nice twirl and twist along the way and she looked like a magazine cover in her white dress flowing to the beat.

Since then I have encouraged couples to make certain the song they choose for their First Dance is one that really speaks to whom they are as a couple even if it may be a bit quirky or off the beaten trail a bit. It is amazing to feel the energy of a Bride and Groom when they let go of everything for that moment and let the moment be theirs. It actually inspires me after all these years of weddings and DJing to witness this special slice if life.

I invite all couples to choose a song that really is yours. It is easier to choose the most popular current love song like Bruno Mars, which is great too, but sometimes I think digging a bit deeper into what speaks to your love and relationship can even be more beautiful. Please take your time with this and try not to focus as much on how well you will dance the song. If it is your song, it will come through. I invite you to trust yourselves that it will be perfect regardless of your dancing skills or not!

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About the Author
DJ Mystical Michael has over 30 years of DJ experience, and spent 7 years as a full-time DJ.. He started with two Technics turntables playing rock, what we now call Classic Rock. He expanded his repertoire to include Dance and New Wave/Punk, and then became a local favorite for his knowledge and collection of Oldies from the 50’s and 60’s, although not yet born or too young to actually have experienced the music himself. Today, his collection has evolved to over 125GB and 72 days of music covering the period from 1946 to this month with emphasis on Pop, Dance, Rock, Reggae, Oldies, Reggaeton, Hip Hop, Rap, Latin, The Classics and Classical, Lounge, Buddha Bar, Café and Popular Country. In his unstructured time he can be found dancing, creative writing, singing, near food , playing volleyball, meditating, painting/drawing/calligraphy and enjoying beaches, mountains and forests. He just returned to The States after a year and a half in Asia.

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  1. James

    Thank you DJ Mystical Michael for the tip. I am also preparing my wedding music playlist, and you just gave me the idea of choosing songs that resembles more of our relationship. I have also engaged a couple of my violinist friends to do the music for my wedding march, and another to sing our wedding song accompanied by a band we hired. But with your tips, I might ask my lady singer friend to add some twist to it. Thank you for the tips again!

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